...Monday...

The last time I fasted for a duration, I was 15 years old. (?)

I was involved in a Native Youth prayer group, thinking back on it, kinda new-agey take on how Native Peoples pray.
I am talking about a smudge pot, sweat lodge, and prayers to ancestors and the earth to protect us and guide us. The new-agey bit in part due to the number of caucasians involved, irony being decades of forced assimilation to a reversal of some people looking toward spirits for aid. Still, I fasted for direction, guidance. About whether if I was happy, what happiness was, could I be shown it?

During that summer I turned 16, learned about boarding school, flew from Alaska to Oklahoma, and experienced the two years that shaped me into the person I am today. If I had not met the people I met, from my coaches, to the dorm matrons, fellow students, I am confident in saying I would not be the person I am today.

As an adult, a mother, I am fasting for the same reasons. To lift the Davani Family in prayer, really reinforcing the need for a miracle as only He can provide, praying for acceptance and guidance.



Sunday afternoon, I spoke with J.ssn. Was I mean? I reckon so because he was offended. We talked regarding our relationship. I view him as a younger brother who needs an older sister, who will not offer slack, tease him, etc, etc. As with other friends I welcome, the world is far too big, bold, to down a friend. Especially a friend who Believes. I do have a fondness for J.ssn. He does appear older, one does wonder what caused him to appear older. But at the same time, I find it hard to not treat him as younger, still as a teenager. To me, he still is. Even with the responsibility he places on himself, I still find that he is young.

I think that his view is a beginning tentative friendship, as he said, "It seems we missed some steps." We had missed some steps? We had an argument a few weeks back, to me that cemented our friendship, after all, we are still talking, but I guess not on his end. He isn't comfortable with how I am approaching him in our conversations, but to me he is still so young. I show him affection in the ways my siblings from the 'Side and I do, upfront talk and teasing. After our conversation, he is not comfortable, so I will stop. Both people have to ready for a friendship, or even an acquaintanceship,


It did put me in poor spirit, after all, I know what being uncomfortable is. I felt bad in placing him in that position.



I got dressed for the wedding at church, and then went to pick up my passengers for the wedding drive.
I haven't had the opportunity to LL since January, so I was happy to see her again :D
Her and I talked regarding J.ssn, and I explained my viewpoint. It was nice to talk to her and see her, and she gave me some feedback.


It still leaves me questioning on whether I am too friendly? Too bubbly. Too forward.


The wedding was great!! Congratulations to the happy couple!! I was teased because I turned down galbi tchim (?) for the wedding food. It was fun though.




I started my fast last night, after dinner at the wedding. I turned off my notifications from facebook, logged off my iphone app. Logged off my twitter account. I went to bed shortly after midnight.

http://aa.usno.navy.mil/cgi-bin/aa_rstablew.pl

Is my sunrise and sunset table I am using this week for my observance. Daylight savings is not reflected, so an hour must be added during that time.

According to this my fast will end on 4 April (Easter) at 7:24 pm. I want to invite ya'll to come and break my fast with me that evening, Easter is our time for renewal, a time of thanks, a time of rejoice.

Text me or leave a comment if ya'll are interested. :D